By Shaykh Ismail Kamdar
“And one of His signs is that He created for you spouses from among yourselves so that you may find comfort in them. And He has placed between you compassion and mercy. Surely in this are signs for people who reflect.”
(Surah al-Rum 30:21)
One of the greatest sources of joy in this world is a righteous loving spouse. The Prophet SAW said, “Everything in this world is a source of enjoyment, and the greatest source of enjoyment is a righteous spouse.” Allah created men and women for each other. When love develops between husband and wife, it forms a powerful bond that makes their relationship a true blessing.
From the goals of marriage in Islam is to have someone in your life who is your primary source of peace and joy. Other goals of marriage include protection of chastity, producing offspring, experiencing love, and access to halal intimacy. All these goals are important, and both spouses must strive to assist each other in achieving these goals through their relationship.
You Are My Sakina
The word used in the above verse is taskunu, which has its root in Sakina. Sakina refers to tranquillity or inner peace, and this means that our homes should be places in which we feel peace and tranquillity, a refuge from the outside world and all its trials.
There are many ways in which we can be that source of peace for our spouses. Both spouses need to work on this for it to work, and a one-sided effort can often result in frustration and resentment. Make it a priority in your life to make your spouse smile and laugh.
Men, take care of your women. Provide for them well, spoil them to the best of your financial capabilities, provide them with such homes, possessions, and children, that they feel loved, desired, and appreciated. Spend quality time with them and share in their hobbies even if it is something you do not personally enjoy. Make time for quality conversations and ensure that you fulfil your wife’s intimate needs.
Ladies, make your home a place where your husband feels at peace and wanted. Welcome him home from work with a good meal, smiling faces, and joyful conversations. Make him feel appreciated for his hard work and generous spending and make him feel respected. A man, even if he holds a low position at work, should feel like The Man when at home. This inspires him to work hard and do his best to provide for his family. Give him space to unwind after work, and ensure you take care of his intimate needs too.
When both men and women understand the needs of the opposite gender and go out of their way to please their spouses, the result is a powerful joyful relationship that brings peace and happiness to both their souls.
Marriage requires investment of time and effort, but the results are worth it.
There are very few things in this world that can produce happiness on the same level as a strong loving marriage.
About the Author: Shaykh Ismail Kamdar is an expert in Fiqh, Tafsir, History, Personal Development, and Education.
Source: Izzah Academy
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